Zeroth Directive

Archive IV

[Classified Log] Columbia's official advertising campaigns portray the vast wilderness as a place of hope where a man can achieve his dreams. Many of those who come from the frontiers tell us that while they are not without hope, to your average Pioneer, the hope that can be found there is simply too insignificant. And the solid waste disposal plants, commonly referred to simply as 'disposal plants' or even 'landfills,' are the places with the least hope. In principle, the plants are the lowest of all the facilities found on the frontiers, staffed only by criminals allowed to serve their harsh sentences there as Pioneers. Those who work there do not even have the right to leave without permission. Yet, there are just as many innocents, those who offended the wrong person, and those stubbornly unable to yield any profits who have been sent to the disposal plants. When surrounded by fierce criminals, it is only natural for the place to fall to the lowest of low. Fortunately, Humus stood up. At first, he was simply a hardy punk, new on the block, who caught Oripathy when handling contaminated scrap metal. But he did not give in after he was infected. Instead, he started using all kinds of junk to put together a set of very bulky protective equipment. Everyone thought he was as much of an idiot as he was unlucky, but right before embarking on another similar mission, the worker in charge of retrieving scrap metal came to him, embarrassed. After he was done recovering the metal, the man was completely drenched in sweat and exhausted as he got himself out of Humus's protective equipment. Everyone mocked him as 'Unlucky Sap Jr.' However, when out of PR concerns the higher-ups sent a doctor to give everyone at the plant checkups and Oripathy diagnoses, 'Unlucky Sap Jr.' was the only one out of those who had handled the contaminated metal to not be infected. And just like that, Humus realized that even though he too was just more trash dumped in the disposal plant, at least he had the right to refuse to simply rot away. After that, things unfolded as naturally as they could be. With the toolbox he used for teardowns and retrofits in his left hand, and a heavy sickle in his right, he made a few things, got in a few fights, saved a few men, and in the end became the boss of the whole disposal plant. One that everyone, from lowly office workers who were wrongly convicted to merciless burglars, looked up to. And he was only too willing to impart all his skills and knowledge to them, be it how to read and write or how to pick locks. They all knew that if Humus had only a piece of meat left in his bowl, he'd rather share it with everyone else in the plant and drink the little soup remaining left in the pot. Fortunately, thanks to all the little tricks he has up his sleeve, along with his imaginative thinking, such hardships have never once occurred.

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